1. Secret of a Long Life
Grandpa Jones was celebrating his 100th birthday and everybody complimented him on how athletic and well-preserved he appeared. “Gentlemen, I will tell you the secret of my success,” he cackled. “I have been in the open air day after day for some 75 years now.”
The celebrants were impressed and asked how he managed to keep up his rigorous fitness regime.
“Well, you see my wife and I were married 75 years ago. On our wedding night, we made a solemn pledge. Whenever we had a fight, the one who was proved wrong would go outside and take a walk.”
2. Jesus is Watching
A burglar got into a house one night. Shining his flashlight on the floor in the dark, he heard a voice saying, “Jesus is watching you.”
He looked around nervously, shook his head, and kept looking for valuables. He again heard, “Jesus is watching you.”
This time, he shone his light all over, and it rested on a parrot.
He asked, “Did you say that?”
The parrot admitted that it had. “I’m just trying to warn you, that’s all.”
The burglar said, “Warn me, huh? Who are you? What’s your name?”
“Well, what kind of stupid people would name a parrot ‘Moses’?”
The bird answered, “I don’t know; I guess the same folks who would name a Rottweiler ‘Jesus’.”
3. Private Grief
A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, “Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?”
The first man approached him and said, “Sir, I don’t wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I’ve ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?”
The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied, “My wife’s first husband.”
4. Black and White
Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, “Why is the bride dressed in white?”
“Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life.”
The child thought about this for a moment, then said, “So why is the groom wearing black?”
5. Wedding Rehearsal
During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the minister with an unusual offer. “Look, I’ll give you $100 if you’ll change the wedding vows. When you get to me and the part where I’m to promise to ‘love, honor and obey’ and ‘forsaking all others, be faithful to her forever,’ I’d appreciate it if you’d just leave that part out.”
He passed the minister the cash and walked away satisfied.
The wedding day arrives, and the bride and groom have moved to that part of the ceremony where the vows are exchanged. When it comes time for the groom’s vows, the minister looks the young man in the eye and says, “Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life and swear eternally before God and your lovely wife that you will not ever even look at another woman, as long as you both shall live?”
The groom gulped and looked around, and said in a tiny voice, “Yes.”
The groom leaned toward the minister and hissed, “I thought we had a deal.”
The minister put the $100 into his hand and whispered back, “She made me a much better offer.”
Lol 🙂 Hope you had a good laugh? ‘Have A Good Laugh series’ is a new category on the Victory Path. Simply to ensure that in the midst of life’s business, hard work, and stress, you have a little time to smile and be happy. We all need a little fun and laughter in our lives. The Bible says “A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones” (Proverbs 17:22). Which of these jokes made you laugh the most?
Jokes culled from : http://jokes.christiansunite.com/
Pictures Courtesy of Google Images