What I want to discuss today, got me thinking a lot and I would really like to ask if this is possible. It’s something to think about and ponder on as well. I was studying the Bible sometime ago and I noticed some words I had never seen before, or heard any one preach. Permit me to share.
“Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives.
Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes.
Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.
For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves.
They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord.
You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.”
– 1 Peter 3:1-6 (NIV)
Let’s take a look at the Amplified version
For it was thus that the pious women of old who hoped in God were [accustomed] to beautify themselves and were submissive to their husbands [adapting themselves to them as themselves secondary and dependent upon them].
It was thus that Sarah obeyed Abraham [following his guidance and acknowledging his headship over her by calling him lord (master, leader, authority). And you are now her true daughters if you do right and let nothing terrify you [not giving way to hysterical fears or letting anxieties unnerve you].
– 1 Peter 3:5-6 (AMP)
The scriptures show that women of old submitted to their husbands and obeyed them. Sarah in particular obeyed Abraham and called him her lord, master, leader and authority. This was different from thinking I know he is my head, lord or master, she literarily called him lord. It’s the same way no one would go before a King or royalty without saying my lord. It was a pure reverence of his authority, and lordship over her. I now wonder how many women can go before their husbands today and say “my lord, I am about to do such and such.” Or go before their husbands and say “my master, my leader, the authority that is placed over me, what would you like….”
Can you? Have you ever seen the position of a wife from this perspective before? Don’t just react to this article the way you feel about, think about it first.
Do you understand why Sarah did such a thing? If you remember clearly, Sarah was never discarded by her husband. He treated her like royalty too. They lived together, partnered with each other, even till old age. In fact, he loved her so much and even obeyed her request to do something not right like sleep with her maid. Her submission to his authority seemed to make him grant her requests. Ladies do you know why this applies to you today? Why exactly would this be mentioned in the New Testament? Would it help a marriage or break it?
I’m putting the question to you today dear ladies. Can you call your husband lord, master, leader, authority? Or do you believe you are both equals in the marriage? Or that a man should not be submitted to? Remember, these are not just my self created questions, they stem directly from the word of God.
Share your thoughts, reasons and lessons from your experiences too. I believe men should also share their thoughts, so that we han have views from both sides on the subject.
Don’t forget to comment 🙂 Let’s sincerely talk about this, I’m sure there is a lot to learn.
Thanks for reading.
Victory Odunjo
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Victory Odunjo's Blog 
I personally daydream of seeing the countenance on my future husband’s face, after the wedding and consummation, and we have settled into ds covenant journey, when I whispers into his ears “Good morning my lord”. As a godly woman, and growing to become, I believe that me calling my husband, my lord, reflects how deeply I honour and reverence God’s Word, Lordship and Authority over my head, my life and my home. This is a symbol of our relationship and fellowship with the Ultimate Head, Master and Lord of all.
In God’s Presence, we are equal, as God being the Head and Master of both spouses. But in marriage, which is intended to portray God Art and Act of Love between to broken people, my husband is my authority, head, master and lord, and therefore, I submit.
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Very deep Victoria. It’s not an easy pill to swallow. Many women also believe they’ll be less by calling their husbands lord, even the married ones, and that’s not correct. But the word of God is very clear, and it’s what we should follow. I’m glad you’ve been able to come to terms with understanding what this scripture means, and you are willing to act it out. Bless you Victoria 🙂
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Status co should remain.
Bible remains our only and absolutely standard.
No waving at all.
Although I’m not married sha
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Yes my bro. No wavering
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I happen to have come across this scripture before but in my mind I probably thought mummy Sarah’s own was too much, I know books from Shakespeare’s time would also have women calling their husbands with that kind of deference. I believe that a woman absolutely must submit to her husband and respect his authority but sometimes it might seem far fetched, especially when you think you are right and he might not be. God’s word tells us that all authority is given by God however so we will respect the man naa ni. Which is why it is of paramount importance that the husband knows God, God has to be the head of the man for true headship in marriage to come from man to wife. We also have to be praying for our men because it takes grace to be godly, what they do affects us so much! In this era that women want to hold their own it will be tougher to always call husband up and say, I want to do this, what do you think or can I? But I think that it will be a wonderful thing when both man and wife see themselves as partners and the woman holds her husband as word after God and the husband loves his wife with the whole of him. That’s how it should be so nothing spoil. Lol
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Correct! Your perspective says it all. Thanks Tope
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I don’t think I can call my husband my Lord o…lol…it is funny to me, guess the marriage will be too spiritual joor; guess it is for the spirikoko sisters.lolz.
Where am I going to put the #romantic names#sweetheart#dear#smiles.
I will respect my man and submit to him. For me, God is our Lord, my hubby #My crown#ade mi#.sounds good right!!! Guess it’s better for me like that.
Victory, oya tell me how you’ll feel if your wife calls you My Lord?lol
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Lol. U r funny. Victor tell us how u would feel
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Lol.. Hehe Jumsee.. You ehn! Well if I’m her Lord, then she is my queen not my slave. I’ll gladly reciprocate the honour and respect she gives me my treating her the way the spouse of a king or lord should be treated. I really don’t think there is a big deal in this, it’s just that things have changed, there have been a couple of negative experiences, divorce rates are sky rocketing, and so people are changing and taking new perspectives in their marriages. If we were all thought like this and we saw every married couple we knew practice it, I’m sure it would not be such an issue. The real deal though is that submission is key, not just calling a man lord is important, but also treating him as one is.
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@Tope….lol at mummy Sarah#Funny#
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This really got me thinking. In this generation where we want to have equal rights, we don’t even intend to submit totally to spouse, talk more of calling him lord and revering him as such. But then like u said, this is God’s word, and we ought to obey. I pray for grace.
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True. In our generation it looks so unreal and impossible. You got it right. God’s word is paramount and His grace is enough for us.
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“And as the church is under Christ authority, so let wives be under the rule of their husbands IN ALL THINGS” Ephesians 5 vs 24 (BBE)
This is some hard chew for an average modern lady
Here is the lordship thingy emphasized again…
Struggled with this understanding for almost 7years
But it’s God Word… and nothing like being too spiritual…
If there was, Victory, Jonathan and the families of CCI and SpiritGym won’t be my family…😊😄
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Victoria, God bless you for this mindset. Scripture teaches that we should “let this mind be in us which was also in Christ…” Even though he did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, yet he submitted unto the point of death on the cross.
Victory – I will like to know your thoughts about Sarah’s obedience when Abraham told her to say she was his sister and she ended up being taken by that king before God intervened.
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Do I call Ron lord No! but nor does he expect me to, as we know Victory it’s not the norm to do so today, words and expressions change over time but as a Wife our heart focus needs to be the same as Shara had for Abraham, respect and willing submission.
Marriage is being united in Love for God and each other and remembering to speak tenderly words of Love, kindness, concern, understanding and heartfelt compassion when needed.
I have never seen a Marriage end for any reason where the Wife is Loved and cherished as Christ Loves the Church and her Husband considers her needs first and appreciates her as his Helpmate, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
Or have I seen it end when a wife also Loves and willingly submits to her Husband too, respecting his role as Spiritual Leader under God and so having the final decision in all matters of importance in the Spiritual welfare of the family and when she supports and encourages him as his Helpmate, both in words and actions.
When both Husband and Wife honour their Marriage vows to remain committed through the good and bad, keep the Marriage bed pure, both physically and in their thoughts, to not withhold physical contact, to always consider each other as people of worth and to forgive continually and not focus on weaknesses and shortcomings but each others strengths, than that’s a Marriage made in Heaven..
To find each other we need to find Jesus first, only He can empower us through The Holy Spirit as we choose to live the Christian Life and when we do 100% we have a good Marriage too.
Can we do all these things in the Carnal flesh, No it must be put to death as we aim to be perfected in Love.
Christian Love – Anne.
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I literally applied this scripture to my life and began to live out truth today. In answer to what I believed to be a selfish request on my husband’s part, and after getting past the fear factor, I was TRULY able to respond with a heart attitude of submission and respect. I simply answered “Yes, sir.”
He didn’t know how to respond. I was only able to submit to my husband after meditating on Romans 15:7. I am called to accept (forgive, love, etc…) my husband in the same way Christ accepted (forgave, loved, etc…) me, all for the glory of God.
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Of course, I can’t wait for the day to do it! I’ve always wanted to say this since I was 17, when God begin to teach me about Ruth and her relationship to Boaz. She submitted even before Boaz was her husband yet but her actions showed him that this was a woman ready for a husband so he exalted her for humbleness and made Ruth his wife because of her willingness to position herself as a with humility. However, be mindful of the woman lead her into love and in all your ways honour God as she honours you.
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Only God is Master or Lord.
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I found myself here after researching this topic some. I remembered that Rabboni means master which is what Mary addressed Messiah as after His resurrection, and Jesus Himself instructing us not to call any man on earth our master (for we have but one Master which is Christ, and one Father who art in heaven) also sprung to mind. So, I dug a little deeper.
The word [kurios] used by Sarah, was also used by men in scriptures as an address for other men, even among the unbelieving pharisees and those who were equal in social standing, so the contextual connotation of ‘my lord’ is an outward show of respect rather than a title always depicting submission of the user.
It’s also worth noting when Peter wrote that Sarah called Abraham her lord, it was referencing Genesis in which we are told about Sarah laughing with herself at the notion of God giving her and her husband a child yet; in their old-age even. This is the only time we are told of her actually calling him her lord, so a) we can’t assume this was her regular title for him, and b) she was laughing ‘with herself’ meaning this occurrence we are told of most likely took place within the confines of her own mind (unless she talked to herself aloud mind you), and in calling him such, as per Peter, she displayed true (inward) respect and submission–though as earlier noted, it didn’t always imply the latter–in regards to her husband.
That said, I get the strong sense calling many men ‘my lord’ in this day and age (when it isn’t a commonly used term anywhere outside of aristocracy and us common folk hear the use of such addressal only in game of thrones and the bloodthirsty sex-laden likes) may have the propensity to develop somewhat of a complex in them which the simple ‘Sir’–as we called our teachers/professors (who are tasked with teaching/guiding and safeguarding us: men who we *hopefully* respected)–would in much less danger of fostering.
I have considered using it [my lord], yet it’s rather outdated terminology, and I remain acutely aware of the fact its usage could cause a man to fall prey to the idea that he is more than he is in the eyes of God for starters, and moreover, the only One I have ever known as such is the Lord my God. So I can confidently say unless I have a divine revelation, I will never call my husband my lord, in part for not wanting it to cause my husband or I to stumble, but if anything mostly for fear of offending the LORD by in essence taking away some of His glory (in my own mind’s eye) to give unto another who despite our love would still remain a mere mortal man. Like Sarah, I hope to one day think of my husband in such terms–don’t worry; not married: eighteen and single here– and relish in my heart the earthbound authority my husband has been appointed over me, but I really just don’t foresee anyone finding the proclamation of such a man to be my lord ever coming from my mouth: because of all the implications it holds in my mind (‘thus, the Lord saith’ being but one) as opposed to an unwillingness to respectfully and lovingly submit to a husband.
That title aside, Rabbi is the literal shortening of Rabboni, so that just won’t be happening purely for the fact Jesus said don’t call anybody that! Christ is our Master: the head of the church which is the body of Christ. And my husband, God be willing I should find one, shall be the head of my body–as two cleave together to become one flesh. Yet, flesh shall perish, and when it comes down to it, loving the Lord thy God with all your heart, and all your soul, and all your mind, is not a light charge, and it certainly doesn’t leave any room for another master (or lord) in one’s heart or mind.
To add to that I envision some men would wish to be called and some women would wish to call their husbands my lord simply to satisfy their imaginations. So, for women I think it’s important to consider why you want to call your husband whom you may not have even met yet such, ie. do you want to call your husband ‘master’ (or lord) because you’ve heard it paraded about on GOT, or because you actually respect/imagine yourself respecting the man that much?
If it’s the former, you probably need to rethink some things. Nevertheless, ‘squire’ has an archaic whilst still fanciful ring to it and IMO sounds just as ridiculous in context as calling a created being lord or master does. Squire: 1. (noun) A man of high *social standing who owns and lives *on an *estate in a rural area, especially the chief *landowner *in such *an area. “The squire of Radbourne Hall.” 2. (noun; historical) a young nobleman acting as an attendant to *a knight* before becoming a *knight* himself. *Just change 1: ‘social’ to ‘spiritual,’ and ‘on’ to ‘with,’ and ‘estate’ to ‘helpmeet,’ ‘landowner’ to ‘lord-commander,’ and ‘in’ to ‘of,’ and ‘an area’ to ‘a woman,’ and change 2: ‘a knight’ to ‘the Holy One,’ and ‘a knight’ to ‘holy one,’ aaannd it totes fits the bill by this account* 3. (verb) (of a man) accompany or escort (a woman). “She was squired around Rome by a reporter.”
Anyhow, I’m wrapping this up shortly to keep it as brief as possible, but what I’ve come away from this little dig with is that it’s a sincere respect for your husband that translates into genuinely reverent thoughts and spoken words which are indicative of the type of inward submission we should be in. I think (disclaimer: just my opinion) why we think what we think and say what we say is more important than the exact turn of phrase we use to think and say those things as long as the intent is clear to whomever we are communicating with. I mean, in actuality simply saying [kurios] may denote respect outwardly, but it is still simply a word that can also be used out of pure courtesy when inwardly respect for the person you’re addressing may be lacking… Heartfelt behaviour on the other hand speaks volumes. ie. one shouldn’t just say her husband is her lord, but rather she should actually act like she knows it to be true.
PS: In closing, here’s a link I recommend you check out if you’re curious on the matter and have read (or scrolled 🙂 this far: http://www.torahforwomen.com/1peter3.html
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After 25 years of marriage, prayer and Bible study and so many many prayers and studies about marriage (it is the most greatest human relationship in the Bible) I have decided this week I am going to start calling my husband lord. I have spoken with him about it.
Now here me please, or don’t. My husband is by human calculation a “good man.” He loves the lord, he works hard and h provides for my family. He is honest, treats his employees with great care and appreciation and is a much better daddy than I ever had. There are still things that we disagree on but God has finally opened my eyes to His truth revealed in scripture. I am willing to die and sacrifice to speak praises into my husband that may help him become all God desires him to be.
I will also add that I don’t think this is possible for someone who has not fully unveiled themselves before God. My identity in Him had to come before I was willing to sacrifice even when I don’t think my husband deserves it. For me, it is a reminder every single day that God alone gave me a husband and I will choose to value and cherish what God has given me.
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